So what you trying to say is???? I'm not a "Chreestian" if I don't pass your picture along..... Yeah right!!!

Blog Vocabulary:

Chreestian- pronounced just like it's spelled... a parody of the real word Christian. It means church folk, primarily bench members who attend church from time to time but not really into the politics of church... i.e. CME, Funerals, and for the Black History Program.

Bench Members- In short means: The only thing I come to church to do is sit down, listen and dip! These members usually sit on the last 6 rows for easy exit in the event that the service runs too long or they collect too many offerings!

CME- Christmas, Mother's Day, and Easter , not to be confused with the denomination; this is usually the only time these Chreestians attend church.

Fune- The dialectical way some old folks and young ones too, in the black community pronounce funeral.

Honey Boom- That means, I don't care one way or the other so get out of my face with that mess.

Laid Away Nice- Serves as a description of how good of a job the family and funeral home did in dressing their loved one for their final departure (this comment is also followed by a turned down lip and a head nod).

Whoooa Yes/Boy- That means I just got happy!!

Getting Happy- What southern black women call shouting or crying in church or on the phone or at the funeral..... Just depends on who you ask!

Cue My Music- This term means I can hear the organ rift and the drums in my ear that encourage you to shout for 30 minutes or until your feet and knees start hurting, at which point you can just bow your head and bounce slowly and shake your arms loosely until you pass out!!!

OK! Now that we got those house keeping items out of the way.....


Do you see the above listed picture!!!!! There is nothing that gets my knee hi's in a roll like these pictures on Facebook! I mean granted I get it! You love Jesus.... and so do I, but why is it that my love is based on whether or not I press the share button on Facebook or not Honey Boom you Bench Members kill me, LOL!!!!

There is nothing more disturbing then logging on to my news feed and seeing about 4 of these pictures. You know the ones that make you feel like a loser or a sinner if you don't click SHARE??? I mean WTH????? I don't know about you (Mr. and Mrs. Sainty Pants) but my "Chreestian" friends will put you but on blast and say something like " Y'all Facebook Preachers and Pastors kill me with this" etc...... if you share too many links so in the interest of not getting blasted, I decline!

Further, I don't even think Jesus looks like this.... I think that this guy favors Bo Duke, from the Dukes of Hazzard, so please stop trying to make me think he looks like this..... I personally just can't do this one!!!!!! Generally, CME's and Bench Members are responsible for passing these pictures around..... I suspect that after a night of hell raising they get up glad that the Lord let them live and they think sending out the above mention pictures with the "IF YOU FEEL AS GUILTY OR AS HOLY AS I DO, SHARE THIS LINK/MESSAGE." Well from my heart to yours, Honey Boom x2...

I ain't never heard nobody at the "fune"say, well I know she/he went to Heaven cause they sent out at least 200 of those I love Jesus post on Facebook! IJS......


So the  next time you get one of these pictures and start worrying about your salvation or how Chreestian you are for chooing to not send it..... Say to yourself Honey Boom, I ain't finna let these heathens worry me.... In the words of my Granny... Last time I checked, "Yeen got no Heaven or Hell to put me in" Delete!!! Whhhhoooooooooaaa BOY!! I feel like I just gave somebody a release!!!! Y'all done let me get happy this early the morning!!!!  Cue my Music......

Peace Love and Comic Relief, Tameka